Boy Meets Girl on ITV1

There aren't many things that get my Feminist hackles rising. I'm not a Feminist, or even a woman, so it takes quite a bit for me to get annoyed about the portrayal of women on screen (or stage, or in print etc.). ITV's Boy Meets Girl was enough.

As the title implies, this is a gender-swap show. Apparently, it's a comedy; the laughs are – present, yes, but – pretty few and far between, to be honest. Martin Freeman's blokey bloke, Danny, finds himself mysteriously zapped into the body of fashion journalist Veronica (Rachael Stirling), after an implausible meeting outside a power generator. There's a nice bit of flashback to tell us how Danny got there, and it sets him up as an interesting character, while leaving Veronica's past largely blank.

And that's the problem with Boy Meets Girl – it's all about Danny. Veronica is vapid (and that's not just handy alliteration, she really is vacuous – her mind as well her story). The first episode focusses on what Danny – in Veronica's body – did after the body-zapping. Without wanting to ruin it for you, s/he got rushed to hospital to be collected by the one bright spark of the episode: Paterson Joseph (I tell a lie: Danny's B&Q co-workers are alright as well). After that, we've essentially got what feels like a conveyor belt of man-in-a-woman's-body scenarios. Which is fine, but the woman-in-a-man's-body stuff is conspicuous by its absence. The ITV blurb only tells us about what happens to Danny, and that bias is seen throughout the show.

So, what does this man-in-a-woman's-body learn? Predictably, he has fun with his new breasts and a vibrator. He also learns that the woman whose life he now has – the fashion journalist, remember? cue derogatory scowls and cries of 'fashion journalist?' - may well be having an affair with her friend's man (who happens to have 'callous, womanising jerk' written all over his smug face). The sort of man you'd have to be pretty dim to want to have a relationship with. Danny (as Veronica) has conversations with her female friend where they essentially say that men are rubbish. Somehow it's not very fresh or satisfying. In fact, it's all rather obvious, and that conversation is especially awkward; it just doesn't feel real.

What quickly became obvious is that Boy Meets Girl was written by a man, imagining what it would be like in a woman's body. I checked – no, really, I hate to make baseless assumptions – and it turns out that writer David Allison is indeed a man. Gosh. This may be why we have such vapid women, who somehow can't fend for themselves. Occasionally, Veronica (as Danny) is seen drifting around looking confused – which is understandable, but at the same time, Danny (as Veronica) has adjusted and slipped into her life by convincing everybody that s/he is just a bit shaken after her electrocution.

The female fashion journalist is utterly incompetent, while the male DIY store worker scorns writing horoscopes but can barely handle stilettos. That's all you need to know about this stereotyped, one-sided affair.